A Comment/Review on Professor Tulip’s “Lap Dance”
Another first-time EMCSA author gets the spotlight, today. As the title of this post indicates, the chosen piece is Professor Tulip’s Lap Dance. Synopsis below:
Daniel is hypnotized during a private dance at a strip club.
A straightforward description for a rather straightforward story and by that I mean, if you’re looking for any twists or anything, there isn’t one. What you read above is exactly what you get and not much else. The plotting is minimal, and the same goes for overall characterization. As mentioned above, it’s the author’s first submission to the EMCSA, probably the first foray into erotic mind control fiction as well, and it shows.
We’ve all been first timers; we all made mistakes and fell into the trappings of the genre; we all struggled with our ideas from time to time. I definitely see some of those struggles here. Punctuation-wise, the tale is lacking, and there are some questionable word choices here and there as well. Overall, there’s a lack of polish to just about everything. The good moments are never fully developed and because the plot is so bare bones, everything ends too quickly as well. Daniel is hypnotized, becomes a financial slave, and whatnot and that’s it.
It may seem I’m being incredibly judgmental and dismissive, but that’s not where I’m going with this. Unlike what some believe, writing is hard. The author did what many refuse to do and committed his ideas into a piece of writing. It’s definitely raw, there’s plenty of room for improvement from start to finish, starting with a tighter editing and some more development for instance, but it’s a start, a first step into what I hope is something bigger so, despite my criticisms, I wish for this post to serve more of an encouragement than anything else.
Writing is hard. Getting your ideas out there is hard. Being creative is hard. Anyone that chooses to do so deserves my respect. Anyone that keeps trying and learning more and more as they go along, even more so. I hope Professor Tulip writes more stories and evolves them as time goes by.
Thank you for reading.
