March 2020

Unnecessary

Devon glanced at his computer screen, the rotating spiral capturing his thoughts. With great difficulty, he asked:
“Honey, is this a new screensaver?”
“Yes.” His girlfriend replied. “Do you like it?”
“Very much but… Are you trying to hypnotize me?”
“Do I need to try?”
Devon’s eyes glazed again as his voice trailed into nothingness.

Who doesn’t love the classics? Hypnotic screensavers certainly qualify, don’t they? If you had one on your computer right now, would you mindlessly go into trance and obey every order without question? I think you would. Do it today. Do it tomorrow. Do it all the time.


The Rush

The time-traveling hypnotist glanced at the documents on William Seward’s desk.
“You’re really paying $7 million for Alaska, huh?”
“I believe we’re going to strike gold there, Miss.” The Secretary of State replied.
“You most certainly will… half is mine, of course.” She waved her pendant.
“Of course,” he drooled. The rush was just beginning.

This piece was inspired by two historical moments, not just one, although the second wouldn’t have taken place the way it did if it weren’t for the first.

On March 30th, 1867, U.S. Secretary of State William H. Seward signed a treaty with Russia for the purchase of Alaska for $7 million. Despite the bargain price of roughly two cents an acre, the Alaskan purchase was ridiculed in Congress and in the press as “Seward’s Folly,” “Seward’s icebox,” and President Andrew Johnson’s “polar bear garden.” Thirty years later, following the Klondike Gold Rush, gold was also found in Nome. The “new” Alaskan Gold Rush lasted for ten years and contributed a lot to the growth of the territory at the time.

Apparently, it also ended up filling my time traveler’s pockets. What did she do with the money, you ask? Perhaps she used it to fund all of her other temporal shenanigans, who knows?


More than Enough

Rose fiddled with the necklace around her neck.
“What do you think?”
“Not buying it.” Her husband, Matthew, replied.
“Why not?”
“You already have one hundred! More than enough.”
“No more hypnosis this year then.”
“What? Why?”
“You already went under six times for me. More than enough.”
Matthew sighed and grabbed his credit card.

Just a little impromptu that was written before I headed out to work. Today is my last day before a period of “quarantine vacations”. I wanted to write something lighthearted for the occasion. Never say no to a Hypnodomme, especially if you can’t live without her hypnotic control.


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